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7 Things You Can Learn From Toke Makinwa's Book  image

7 Things You Can Learn From Toke Makinwa's Book

Toke Makinwa. OAP. Tv Host. Vlogger. Event planner. All around beauty. Now an author...?

Last year news broke out that Toke's Husband, Maje Ayida had not only been having extra marital affairs with Anita Solomon but also put her in family way. The gossip swirled and the story soon became the trending topic; how a relationship expert became the butt of her own joke. People judged and called her out for spending too much time working instead of taking care of her man, while people were also sympathetic towards the celebrity and gave her their support.

Now Toke has released a tell all book, giving us all the juicy details of everything that went on behind closed doors. From her parents’ tragic death to how she managed to survive after Maje got another woman pregnant. I really have to say; this book is a must read! I was a bit reluctant to read it at first, but once I had the book in my hand, it was difficult to let go (I finished reading it in one night! Who had any idea she was such a terrific writer!) ghost writer? Maybe.

Here are 7 things you can learn from reading 'On Becoming' by Toke Makinwa

1. That Toke Makinwa is human just like you and I; Toke suffered a great loss at the tender age of 8. She lost both her parents to a fire caused by a leaking gas. She faced tragedy again when her husband impregnated his long-time mistress--Anita Solomon. Say what you will about the OAP but, she's a tough cookie to have made it this far, when many people would have crumbled under so much pressure.

2. That anyone can be a fool for love. In the book, Toke writes in detail about how Maje Ayida was in total hold of her mumu button and every time she convinced herself he wasn't for her, all he had to do was say a few words and she was back at his feet. It was truly sad to read how easy he manipulated her.

3. That through great pain anyone can emerge a victor; Like I said, miss Makinwa is one tough cookie. She not only rose from the ashes of what had seemed to be her defeat but she turned it around and reshaped it into something lucrative.

4. A man who lies and cheats before marriage will likely, lie and cheat after marriage; people seem to be under the false illusion that marriage fixes a broken relationship. Not at all. But don't take my word for it, ask Toke.

5. Sometimes, listen to your friends and family. They want the best for you. Toke's cousin constantly warned her about Maje but she refused to listen. Even Maje's sister warned her!

6. Never close your eyes to the warning signs. If you suspect something is up with your man or your woman there's a chance you are right. Instincts are very powerful. Don't brush them off.

7. Always keep God first. You'll see that in the book Toke talked a lot about God and her encounters with him, and how much God helped her get through all the hard times with Maje. Who knows where she would have been without the Almighty.

I recommend this one for anyone going through heartbreak, a bad divorce or break up (or for those of us that just want to get the gist of what happened). The pain will only last for a while, for there is hope for the future. Here are some wise words from the OAP herself:

'In the beginning, you'll be mad, you'll feel disrespected. Hatred is your fuel and Revenge becomes the mission. But as time progresses so will your numbness and then you'll realize the Hurt you feel has blessed you tremendously' - Toke 

 

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10 Books You Should Read Before 2017 image

10 Books You Should Read Before 2017

Hi there! Today, I’ll be writing about the top ten books I know I need to read as November bids us goodbye. (TBR means To Be Read, just so you know.)

The last time I checked my Goodreads account, I had over a thousand books added to my TBR shelf, but these ten are the ones I really need to get to. In no particular order, they are:

1. Harry Potter and the Cursed Child – J.K Rowling

Everyone is talking about this book. It’s actually written in form of a script and follows the life of Harry Potter as a Dad to three children and husband to Ginny. And one of his sons is called Albus, (remember Dumbledore?)
I can’t wait to start reading my copy.

2. American Gods – Neil Gaiman

I’ve wanted to read this for a long time. It’s about a man named Shadow, who just gets out of jail. He loses his wife and best friend to an accident and agrees to work for a strange man called Mr Wednesday. This book promises a great deal of creepy goodness, American myths and lots of symbolism.

3. Eleanor and Park – Rainbow Rowell

This is a story of two high school misfits who fall in love. I’ve read a bit of this, but I’m yet to finish it. A lot of my friends like it. I hope to read it this month.

4. The Lost Symbol – Dan Brown

I automatically read anything Dan Brown writes. This one is a rich mixture of religious symbolism and cryptography. Brown never disappoints. I actually left my copy in school but my Dad was kind enough to let me borrow his.

5. Salem Falls – Jodi Picoult

Everyone who knows me well enough knows I’m a sucker for this woman. I read everything she writes and this won’t be an exception. (I have six of her books now.)
This one is about a group of teenage girls who target the main guy with a very dreadful allegation. This book promises to be so good. Can’t wait!

6. November 9 – Colleen Hoover

I saw this book all over Bookstagram a while ago and a lot of people really loved it. I hope I do too. It’s the only romance book on my list and I’m hoping I don’t get disappointed.

7. Room – Emma Donoghue

This book made headlines a while back. Told from the perspective of a five-year-old child who has spent all his life in one room with his mother, Room is a book that discusses the power of resilience and the bond between parent and child.

8. Run – Kody Keplinger

This is the only YA book on my list. It’s about two girls, Bo and Agnes who come from radically different families. The book explores sexuality, family and living with disability. I hope I like this one.
 

9. The Martian – Andy Weir

I’m probably the only one who hasn’t read this book on bookstagram. It’s about a guy who gets stuck in Mars and how he survives. I’m not a big fan of sci-fi but this book comes highly recommend.

10. Under The Udala Trees – Chinelo Okparanta

This book should be the only Nigerian book on LGBT issue (I’m not so sure), but I’m excited to read it. I’ve had it for a while now but just haven’t gotten to it yet. It’s a story woven around two young girls who fall in love during the Nigerian Civil War.

Well, there. These are the books that are at the top of my list this month. Have you read any of them? What book(s) do you want to read so bad this month?

For NG, by ThatGirlDorian

 

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Spots.ng Is Making Sure Every Tourist Finds Something He Loves Before Leaving Nigeria image

Spots.ng Is Making Sure Every Tourist Finds Something He Loves Before Leaving Nigeria

From Yankari to Badagry, from Lokoja to Ife. We just about know the popular tourist attractions in Nigeria and the historical significance each represent. But there’s more than just a handful of tourist attractions in Nigeria and in what could be the most significant attempt by the Nigerian tech industry to preserve the history and beauty of Nigeria, CEO of Nigeria’s largest hotel booking platform Mark Essien has now given us a useful tool which enriches our tour experience.

Spots.ng is a product which the pioneers deem fit to “shake up tourism in Nigeria, and redefine travel, discovery and fun.” And we believe so because not only can you find fun spots close to you,you can also check out comprehensive reviews from previous guests, get exact directions for people who aren’t familiar with the environment, and also get a hotel nearby to rest your head… Sound like the complete package? Absolutely.

“With spots.ng, you only need to say where you want to go – a museum or restaurant in Lagos, the Erin Ijesha waterfall, a polo club or nightclubs in Abuja, somewhere in Calabar, and in an instant, you have it; a list of fascinating spots that best fit your query. Also, a comprehensive review that provides you with all the information that you will need such as directions, safety level, age limits (where they exist), and other such details is made available at no cost. Finally, we link you to great hotels nearby that will fit your bill no matter your preferences.”

The idea behind this came as far back as December 2015 when the parent company’s growth team tinkered with ideas to enrich the hotels.ng consumer experience. Already, the platform boasts of over 3,000 fun spots in Nigeria with Lagos having the most interesting spots.

The entire platform was built by a fantastic team that did well enough to earn high praise from their CTO “we were lucky to have a beautiful team that turned the main challenge into the most exciting part of the entire building process.” – You can tell why when you look at the platform’s attention to user experience.

By interesting spots, the platform doesn’t mean just the fancy and expensive, it also means the Nigerian air, and the amazing cheap local food joint.

“We do not want our users to enjoy only the famous tourist attractions, we want them to truly live in the moment, breathe the local air, discover local delights, enjoy local food, and have a more fascinating experience discovering their locations of interest at their own pace and off their own inclination through a platform that prioritizes their safety, and complementary travel and lodging support.”

The whole package boasts of a lot but what easily stands out is the ability to merge the two concepts together… Hotels and other exciting locations, the way the platforms work hand in hand is incredible.

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Overcoming Shyness image

Overcoming Shyness

Do you ever leave a situation thinking you could have said more than you did? Do you remember that fine guy/babe that you made eye contact with and you really wanted to talk to but you didn’t and the moment passed? Do you also remember that time you were in class during a lecture and you had something you could share with the class but you didn’t because you felt sick in your stomach (fine, it’s probably something you ate)? Now, do you remember when you wanted to approach someone for social/business reasons to ask for the time but you were too hesitant to actually do it?

Everybody is shy to a certain degree; it’s not something that happens to a select group of people. So, why are we shy? Shyness can be as a result of different things for different people, some of them are listed below

  • Having a low self-esteem- You think of yourself in a negative way, the voice in your head keeps telling you that you are not good enough. You try to fit in; you try to be like other people who are already their selves so you end up not being anybody.
  • Excessive Self-consciousness- You’re too preoccupied about how you come off and what people think of you most especially in social situations. You start thinking everybody is watching you and you question everything you’re doing.
  • Labelling- You have been labelled as shy by other people right from when you were a kid, so much that even when you grow up and you’ve grown out of it they still expect you to be a shy kid and you feel you have to live up to that label.

How do you overcome shyness?

I feel I have to say here firstly that ‘There’s nothing wrong with being shy but there is also nothing wrong with being outgoing either’, now let’s get into it

 

  • Acceptance: Accept it for a fact that you’re shy, if you keep resisting it there’s no way for you to work on it. Tell people that you are shy and you will be amazed at how willing they are to help you. Going on a stage and saying you’re shy is actually a great way to relieve you of the tension.
  • List the situations that make you feel shy: Are you shy around your family? Are you shy around strangers? Authority? Opposite sex? Classmates? You need to know which situations trigger your shyness. Are you confident singing in a bar filled with strangers but you can’t speak up in class?
  • Conquer the above list: You don’t have to rush through it, are you shy around strangers, smile and say hi to a stranger on your way out and on your way back. They’re strangers; chances are that you won’t see them again.
  • Stop the comparisons: You might probably never be as expressive as the other guy that works the room, the guy who enters a room and becomes the alpha and that’s fine, you don’t have to be him and comparing yourself with him won’t help you.
  • Focus your attention on others: Instead of being self-conscious all the time, focus your attention on other people, what they’re saying and how they behave. When you stop being so self-conscious, you won’t be bothered about how you come off to people.
  • Practice speaking clearly to yourself: There’s nothing wrong with practicing the speech you’re about to give in front of the mirror or in the car with yourself before you get down. You can even record it and see how you sound to know where you have to improve or the part you think you need to raise your voice. This will save you from the potential embarrassment of mumbling or having to repeat yourself. Speak from your stomach, enunciate your words so that they can come out clearly.
  • Have a good posture: Raise up your chin, sit with a straight back and look at people in the eye when you talk to them, this gives you an air of confidence.
  • Visualize the result: Imagine you standing in front of those classmates and giving that speech that ends up in a standing ovation. Imagine talking to that crush of yours and asking them on a date and they say yes. Visualize yourself being confident, that way when you have to do it you would be prepared.
  •  Find and know your strengths: Just because you can’t sing or dance doesn’t mean you can’t be the life of the party. What about that beat you can make with your mouth that no one knows about because you’re too shy or are you a great listener and you can tell when someone just wants to let off some steam, know your value in every situation.  
  • Remember you are awesome: Instead of thinking that you didn’t dress well or that your tie didn’t match why not think of how awesome you are. You know something these people don’t know or you have something they don’t, so why don’t you share that awesomeness with them.
  • Remember to breathe: When you start feeling anxious, take slow deep breaths, count to ten even, and just breathe till you feel comfortable again. Depending on the environment you could also use a bit of movement, take a walk to the restroom or just move round the room, it helps to shift your state of mind and see things from different perspective.
  • Positive affirmation: Words are very important tools, if you tell yourself that you’re shy and cannot talk to that person whose assistance you need, you probably won’t. Tell yourself positive things repeatedly and watch your subconscious believe it and project it. Telling yourself things like, “I’m wonderful, I’m confident” will go a long way.
  • Be informed: Are you attending a conference or a workshop or a party? You need to be informed of the latest events. Are all the game of thrones characters dead? Is the economy in recession? Is Rihanna still dating Wizkid? Is Messi now BFF with Ronaldo? You need to stay abreast of current events so you won’t be left out of the conversations and end up looking lost and sulking in a corner. You’re not going there to show your knowledge off, you just need to keep it simple and chip into the conversation intermittently.
  • Start a conversation: Remember that story your friends think is funny? That new show on TV? That time you separated two fighting dogs? If you could do that, starting a conversation about it can’t be that hard. When you’re having a conversation, add little details to basic statements especially when you’re answering questions. Instead of answering “yes” to “Do you drink?” say something like “Yeah but only on Sundays”, it keeps the conversation going.
  • Look approachable: Don’t go for events looking like your cat has died or looking like you’re angry with the world or be buried in your phone for the whole event, I know you have 1000 twitter followers whose lives depend on your tweets but leaving them for 2 hours won’t hurt them. You know those people you see at events and you want to talk to? How do they look and act? How about those you won’t want to approach? Which group do you belong to? Smile and make eye contact.
  • Practice being in an uncomfortable situation: You need to get up in class and make that speech. You need to tell that girl to go a date with you. Tell that guy in account department you like his dimple. Introduce yourself to a new person each day, talk to people you won’t normally be having a conversation with, keep doing this and you’ll realise that it gets easier with time.
  • Accept rejection: What if your crush turns you down? That man didn’t want to talk to you? What if you make a mistake in front of your classmates? Fine, they’ll laugh at you. Remember you’re not alone and that we have all faced rejections, it is part of the learning process. What matters is how you handle it, don’t take it personally, it probably wasn’t your fault. What did you learn from the situation? Did you really lose anything if you learnt from the situation? You have to move on also, no need for the self-pity, get out there and try again and keep trying.
  • Record your successes: When you start being able to start conversations with strangers, you’ll be able to see yourself in a different light. You will be more confident in situations you used to be shy. When you get these wins put them down in writing so you can go back to them whenever you’re feeling down.
  • Fake it till you make it: This is very important, act like you’re outspoken, act like you’re confident and if you keep at it, you’ll be surprised to see yourself be more confident. You know that confident friend you have? Or that popular TV host? Imagine you were in their shoes, how would they act? Now, act like that till you become that person.

 

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Claire Danes And Mandy Patinkin Take Us Through Season 6 In New Homeland Trailer image

Claire Danes And Mandy Patinkin Take Us Through Season 6 In New Homeland Trailer

Don’t let the poster fool you, Carrie is just as unstable as we know her to be. With new episodes starting Sunday January 15 at 9pm ET/PT, it sure is going to be a great start to the year. From our earlier stories, we’ve kept you up to date with everything Homeland, however, recent stories have surfaced and we’ve come to know that the entire season will take place between Election Day and the inauguration.

SHOWTIME

 

With Trump winning the presidential elections, the showrunners might have made changes to the script we thought will materialize a few weeks ago. Along with the poster, the cable network has released a four-minute clip which shows behind the scenes featurette of the new season and what we expect along with narrative and insight provided by Claire Daines and Mandy Patinkon (One of our three favorite people).

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Harrysong Leaves Five Star Music image

Harrysong Leaves Five Star Music

Nigerian singer, songwriter, and performer, Harrison Tare Okiri, better known by his music name, Harrysong, has dumped Five Star Music our sources tell us. The award-winning artiste who was formerly signed to Questionmark Records has had a successful career with chart-topping records credited to him even bagging an endorsement deal with ‘Gala’ Beef Roll making him the first ever brand ambassador for the household brand.

His career climaxed in 2014 after he released his groundbreaking single “Betterpikin” which went viral for a very long time. Mr Songs, as he is called, has worked with colleagues in the industry especially with ex-label mates, KCEE and Skiibii.

The announcement of his exit from Five Star Music was seen in an Interview with PlanetTV and on his Instagram page where he posted a logo and captioned it “Alterplate”.

“We are unveiling a new platform; it’s a music platform not a label, it’s a music company owned by Harrysong. It’s not supposed to be surprising, my contract expired longtime ago, no no no no I’m not renewing”, he said.

In the interview, Harrysong sounded upset and unappreciated for efforts he had put into the success of his former label. He revealed that he was signed to Fivestar Music as an artiste and he was also in charge of song writing, vocal coaching and music directing stating he has contributed more than his fair share of music and not being acknowledged for it.

“What bothers me is not the work, what bothers me is the appreciation. You are helping someone that knows nothing and the person is feeling like he is helping you, he is not even feeling, he is telling you that he is helping you”.

You write a song for someone and the person is telling you if I don’t sing your song you don’t blow, it’s childishness, it’s……I don’t know” he added.

Apparently after sharing the Gala and the booze he wasn’t appreciated for it… well Mr. Harrysong we appreciate you and we wish you he best in this new phase of your career.

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Westworld Is Gearing Up To Be A Worthy Successor To HBO’s Game Of Thrones image

Westworld Is Gearing Up To Be A Worthy Successor To HBO’s Game Of Thrones

Earlier this year, it became clear HBO are winding down the clock on the Game of Thrones. Ever since that announcement was made, lovers of the fantasy drama created by David Benioff and D. B. Weiss have waited for something special to make an appearance on their Tv screens. For most of us, that wait ended on the 2nd of October when the same network brought to life Westworld: A show based on the 1973 film of the same name, which was written and directed by American novelist Michael Crichton. Westworld is created by Jonathan Nolan and Lisa Joy, and produced by J. J. Abrams, Jerry Weintraub and Bryan Burk. With Academy award winner Anthony Hopkins leading the cast, it’s no wonder why the show has already been renewed for a second season. But that isn’t where that ends, according to entertainment weekly, the showrunners have as much as 5 years’ worth of materials to keep the show running.

"It wasn’t about getting the first 10 [episodes] done, it was about mapping out what the next 5 or 6 years are going to be, we wanted everything in line so that when the very last episode airs and we have our show finale, five or seven years down the line, we knew how it was going to end the first season." Said James Marsden while explaining why the network halted production for a few weeks.

LIFELIKE ROBOTS DESIGNED TO FEEL AND FUCTION PLAYING PARTS IN LITTLE NARRATIVES

Westworld is a technologically advance western-themed park where visitors pay $40,000 a day to enjoy all the park has to offer; Adventure, sex, mystery, you name it. The park plays home to humanoid robots synthetically generated to look, act, and function as all humans do. They all play different roles in the park as some believe themselves to be actual gunslingers, prostitutes, and outlaws… That is, until the newer builds (Operating systems or layers of codes the humanoid robots are built to run on) are installed on the hosts and the repercussions severe. The robots are built to function and in the case of any programming error or in-park accident, they are wiped clean inside and out leaving no memory of previous lives or builds.

The park is run by Robert Ford (Anthony Hopkins) and owned by a mysterious company which goes by Delos destination. Robert Ford, the co-creator of the park is more interested in the hosts and how he can get them closer to humanity if possible whereas, Delos’ main concern is the intellectual property being destroyed by the ever-tinkering mind of Ford who plays God in this pulsating show. During the course of this show, the most recurrent questions you will have to answer will be “Just how many hosts are on this show and are they limited to in-park activities? i.e. Are there hosts outside of the park?”

 

SPOILERS

The latest instalment of the show gave us an insight to how deep that question goes as one of the most human entities on the show was revealed to actually be a host designed to kill at command – giving rise to another question, has Ford created the ultimate build all along? How many times are we expecting this? After all, we also thought Teddy Flood was a guest. With the central idea the show is built upon, this could go on and on.

HBO

 

But if Bernard is a host, we need this explained...

Or is Ford even more evil than we think?

There was a murder on the last episode… So how to get away with murder will be to create a double for the dead… The dead being Theresa whom Ford earlier confronted but refused to back off. If we’re getting a new Theresa, that will confirm Ford’s comment saying the board has at several times sent people to reprimand him but every time he manages to evade being fired perhaps courtesy of a board member or employee who has been swapped out for a body double.

Bernard having found out he is a host will be a real talking point for the next few episodes. He will be left to confront his morality, existence and loyalty while sourcing information to feed back to his maker. With the show nearing its finale, there have been quite a number of fan theories to suggest the show should have a befitting end.

 

Let’s also not forget that Maeve is up to something.

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Jumia’s Approach To Black Friday: Our First Look At This Year’s Deals image

Jumia’s Approach To Black Friday: Our First Look At This Year’s Deals

Shopping in Nigeria has always been a difficult and time consuming task. Luckily for us, e-commerce came right in time but with the loads of options we have, one could argue just getting yourself to an actual store is easier. There’s Konga, Jumia, Dealdey, yudala and Payporte  just to mention a few. A lot of Nigerians believe these online stores pump their prices way up in exchange for the comfort you get when you forsake the stress of shopping… Whether this is true or not remains to be confirmed but on one day, all the statistics and mathematics go straight out the window.

As you’re aware, Black Friday signifies the day lots of people can get a lot of the things they need at a really discounted price. This retail bonanza comes up only a day after thanksgiving and falls on the fourth Friday of November – This year, it comes up on the 25th of November.

This year’s Black Friday is going to be the messiest of them all. We all know how servers crash and websites pack up as early as 12:30 am on Black Friday morning – That was before the Naira plunged remember. With the economy in a mess and Nigerians looking for an easy fix anywhere, Black Friday is going to be a mess and our e-commerce stores aren’t doing anything to prevent the impending traffic overload… Well, all but Jumia.

Jumia

Jumia have taken time out to stretch the one day rush into 12 remarkable days of savings, almost like the 12 days of Christmas. You can now shop deals on each day to get amazing discounts ranging all the way to 55% on your favourite things. All this lead to the big finale on the 25th. Jumia are quiet about what deal the 25th brings but I’m sure the floodgates will be open for discounts on all products but with everyone doing their shopping 11 days earlier, it probably should be a safe zone.

Dealdey

While Dealdey and Payporte are saying nothing about their deals, Dealdey promises up to 90% discount on certain products.

 

Konga

Konga on the other hand have shown their intent in the Black Friday sales by releasing quite a number of discounted products available for purchase right away.

 

Jumia looks like the place to be this thanksgiving but you can’t tell just yet… If Payporte puts up an initial price of 50,000 for an iPhone 7, you know where the crowd’s going to port.

 

Additional stores to check out this Black Friday

Slot

Kaymu

 

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