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7 Common Misconceptions Movies Taught Us About Love image

7 Common Misconceptions Movies Taught Us About Love

Love doesn't happen at once

Love at first sight? it doesn't happen all at once, it takes more than one shoot. Sometimes you don't even know when it’s happening. They could be your best friend and one day just a little wink of theirs would change it for you and you start seeing them differently. True love builds, as you learn and lose and you learn again. Most times, true love is a crescendo, always rising but never ending and no definite beginning.  

 

Love is not always deserving

Good people don't always love good people and the same goes for bad people too. You can't help who loves you and whom you love. You might fall in love with someone one who doesn't treat you right; you might fall in love with a person who is way out of your league. Love doesn't respect lanes or comfort zones. Princesses don't always end up with a prince, sometimes the prince ends up with the witch and sometimes the frog that’s been kissed still stays a frog and you still love it either way. Angels fall in love with monsters everyday and fight for each other and with each other. We accept the love we think we deserve. 

 

Love is not enough

Love is the beginning and the end but sadly not the entire story. Honesty, communication, endless forgiveness and sacrifices are the other paragraphs in a love story with a happy Ending. To want to be with someone takes more than love because on the days you can't love them what else can you give offer them? Trust me, those days always come. You have to be able to give someone more than love. Love is beautiful but not enough to survive on.

 

Love has an organic span

Allow people to come into your life and change it; allow them leave when it is time. Everything has an organic span, fight for things but don’t force them. Someone might appear into your life for 5 minutes, 5 days, 6 hours, 6 weeks, 7 years or a lifetime, let it bloom. Love is a flower with a cycle, we are the petals and some of us fall off while some of us stay together until the end of that season. And no matter how they leave you grudgingly or with abandon absorb it and let it change and prepare you for the next season.

 

Love hurts but always it can heal

Love will either break you or make you whole, either way it will always build you. 9 out of 10 times love hurts you but 10 out of 10 times it can teach you if you let it. In the movies if you lose it all, someone usually has to come heal you but that’s not true. You learn to love yourself better after every romantic experience and with that evolved love you learn to love people better. Like you trust that your skin will heal after a wound trust that your heart will too.

 

Love is a sacrifice but not the ultimate sacrifice

Yes, to a large extent love is a continuous sacrifice but unlike the movies you shouldn’t give up everything in the name of love. Love would never push you to the extent of losing your identity and individuality. When you can compromise – do, but when you can’t – don’t. You do not always have to compromise for someone who comes into your life. Love must be earned not sacrificed for.  Because when you are in love nothing feels like a sacrifice.  There are 7 billion people on earth go find your soul mate don’t compromise for one.

 

Real love can never be threatened

Sometimes it gets hard you know? Movies either depict love as a breeze of success or as a storm of destruction. Love is real and it is difficult to preserve but it is real. Every diamond has imperfections and so will the best relationships and marriages. There will be tears, torture and turbulence but it will always come with redemption, remedy and resurrection.

 

Submitted by Douye Fumudoh

 

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10 Signs You Might Need A New Boyfriend image

10 Signs You Might Need A New Boyfriend

Do you sometimes think your boyfriend is losing interest in you? Or your relationship just isn’t what it was shaped up to be? If this is you then you’re in the right place. When you first begin dating, you may have believed you could end up getting married or at least getting engaged but as time goes by; you begin to notice some things aren’t what they used to be.

There are a lot of reasons why couples breakup. Apart from the really obvious reasons like infidelity, sometimes, things just don’t feel right because of reasons so small you might not be able to put your fingers to what exactly, Follow these simple steps to know if he’s worth staying with or not.

 

Not heading anywhere

Most women enter into relationships not knowing where they lead, this sometimes is good cause frankly, everyone loves a good surprise but there comes a time you have to ask yourself, where exactly is this headed? When you go 5 months of dating and you notice there really isn’t any sign of intent, pack your things and go.

 

He’s secretive

If he constantly stops you from taking a look at his phone, he’s holding something back... something he’d rather have you not see.

 

He’s a deadbeat

The end goal of any relationship should be marriage, with that at the back of your mind, if he isn’t showing any sign of responsibility (financial) nor has no goals, “miss me with that bullshit”

 

Everyone says NO

This is a little difficult for people. When everyone says you should quit, trust me, it’s better if you do. You only have 1 set of eyes and one body...who knows what people have seen him do, and where?

 

If sex is the only thing right in the relationship

There is no problem if the reason you’re in the relationship is to meet your physical needs but if this isn’t that sort of relationship, it’s a bad sign if all you do is fuck. “Some individuals prioritize needs like sex and physical attractiveness. And while those relationships can last for years, they typically don’t last for many years,” psychologist Seth Meyers, Ph.D., author of Dr. Seth’s Love Prescription

 

His Negative personality traits are becoming harder to ignore

Everyone has bad traits. Most people are aware of this but still choose to enter into relationships because for some reason, the Love you feel makes you overlook these traits. When these traits begin to irritate you in the slightest, there could be a problem but when it gets worse, you need to get out because that could mean the love you feel is wearing out or that he has started taking you for granted.

 

Still attached to your Ex

If one of you is still attached to any of your previous partners, it is time to leave because that means you’re not 100 percent emotionally committed to the relationship.

 

You don’t feel like a priority

When you have to fight for attention then the relationship has long lost its spark and you need to leave or at least rekindle the fire.

 

You’ve been hurt

If you’ve been hurt in any way, physically, mentally or emotionally, GET THE HELL OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP.

 

You only see at appointed times

He meets you only at certain times of the week as per his convenience. He can’t meet you on weekends neither can he talk to you in the evenings because he’s hanging out with his friends, and doesn’t want to be disturbed. But he expects you to be free to meet him or speak with him every time he calls or wants to meet you.

 

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If your relationship status prompted you to read this then you probably need to look for a new boyfriend.

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Dating For Dummies: Don't Take These Days For Granted image

Dating For Dummies: Don't Take These Days For Granted

Hi there, I’m no relationship expert but if you’re like me and don’t know the first thing about what women want or how to keep her satisfied in a relationship, you should take a look at this piece cause it definitely helped me. If you’re worried that I’m the source of the advice, you can rest easy; I got this from my parents who’ve been married for 20+ years and my couple friends who are 3 years and going on strong. Being happy in any relationship is usually the result of feeling highly appreciated by your partner in the little things that they do. A constant reminder of genuine love not just in word but action will go a long way to ensure your relationship keeps going.

Here’s the tip: Remember the days.

It sounds vague but I’ll get to explaining it. In any relationship, there are days that are of more significance than others and have high sentiment and emotion attached to them. It’s crucial not to ever forget the details of some of these days or to especially celebrate your partner on others. It’s a bit of work but when you find the girl that’s worth it, it’s a lot easier.

Day #1: Birthday

This is a pretty straightforward one and on no occasion should you ever forget your partner’s birthday unless of course you want them mad at you for days or are looking to get the cold shoulder. If you forget their birthday; you are just about a step closer to the end of that relationship.

Day #2: First Time You Met

One of the most romantic things a guy can do for his babe is remember the date and details of the day they met; where, how and even how she smelled are all important details. No matter how long ago it’s been, you’ve got to remember so you can blow her away this simple gesture.

Day #3: Valentine's Day

The odds of remaining in a relationship after forgetting Valentine's Day are just about as high as the odds of me dating Kim Kardashian. Everyone is showing her love including folks who wanna seize the bae and if you fail to remind her of your love with the grandest gesture you can afford, I guarantee that she starts entertaining that guy she told you not to worry about.

Day #4: Anniversary

The day you finally professed your attraction to her and made your relationship official is usually impossible to forget but in case you're that forgetful you'd better make a song that'll help you remember. A nice dinner at home or out is usually a must and appreciating her for being in your life never fails to charm. You can even go as far as saying it's the best decision you ever made.

Day #5: First Time You Slept Together

Remembering the first time you slept together will help put her mind at ease that she's more than just another body count and she isn't in a situationship. Pen it down somewhere along with some details and pull this card if she ever begins doubting how much she means to you. Works every time!

Day #6: First Big Break/Graduations

Getting a college degree (Bachelors, Masters or Doctorate) is no mean feat and the euphoria of graduating is only rivalled by that of her first big break/payday. Make sure you let her know how proud you are of her achievements and be ever present that day cause you're the first person she wants to share that euphoria with.

 

There are many other days/moments that can be special to your partner for each distinct relationship and it's up to you to understand that and figure them out but you can never go wrong with these ones.

I hope this helps your relationship going forward and be sure to come back for more tips on "Dating for Dummies 101". Ciao!

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All The Right Things To Do To Her This Valentine image

All The Right Things To Do To Her This Valentine

Valentine’s Day can seem pretty challenging, especially if your relationship is fairly young and you’re still trying to figure her out. You’re trying to walk the thin line between doing too little and going overboard with Christian Grey planned activities but what doesn’t help is the fact that you spent nearly a fortune during the Christmas period with no significant bonding happening. If this is you, well, we have got you covered... at least to some extent - women are hard to understand, not gonna lie.

Start it off just right

If you’re in a relationship, whether you believe in the spirit or significance of this holiday, you’re simply going to have to celebrate it regardless and a simple way to get things started is a text message or a simple phone call but take note that this isn’t done with the motive of wishing her a happy Valentine’s Day but simply to tell her how much you love her and how incomplete and lost in the world you would be if it weren’t for her in your life....You know, that type of stuff.

Show it, somehow

Once you’re done with the first step, she already feels extra special that day and truth be told, if you’re short on cash, it’s fine provided you really execute the first step superbly. If you got a little money to spare, you may proceed.

Now you’re left with showing her how much of those words you meant and a good way to do this is by spending time together but this is where it gets tricky, but we’ll try to talk you through the do’s and don’ts.

DO’S

  • Nothing beats an early gift; try to grab something for your lover on the way to your rendezvous point. As traditional as greeting cards can be, they should do just fine.
  • Spoil her. Don’t just grab a greeting card; get a bouquet of flowers or some simple jewellery. Something to bring out the reds in her cheeks.
  • If you usually go on dates separately, today isn’t the day I’m afraid, try really hard to get a taxi to get her before proceeding to wherever. You can get an uber but these days, we’re not sure that’s a smarter option.

DON’TS

  • Avoid doing the regular; do not go see a movie, it’s a day to spend quality time together, save the movies for later. Ideal is a simple but not so expensive dinner at any restaurant of your choice.
  • Do not go short with the compliments; keep them coming, attack attack attack.
  • Whether you’re going to get dinner, lunch or going somewhere to have fun, do not leave after the event is done, try to spend extra time to talk and do some sightseeing.

Well i think that is that but before i leave to start planning what type of day i’ll be having myself, if you have more than one girlfriend before Valentine’s Day, remember all of them or you’d be surprised you’ll have none the next day.

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