No, really what has it done for you? Has it made you angry? Has it made you bitter? Did it disgust you? If it has ever stirred up any sort of emotion in you, I’m glad, because it means it is working.
Personally, when I learned about feminism, it made me angry, angry at the situation, angry at the society, and most of all angry at myself, I was hit with a self-realization so big, I was in denial for a while. I was a decent guy, how could it be that I was part of the problem? How could something so obvious be staring me in the face and I didn’t know it?
Feminism isn’t about women who hate men, but you knew that already. Feminism isn’t about bitter women who can’t get a husband, but you also knew this already. You know feminism isn’t about all these things but you would rather make it seem that way because you are probably weak and can’t face up to what feminism is really about.
If there was any positive I got out of all this, it is to say that I have learned, and I have also ‘unlearned’, down to the most basic things, I now know I can’t go around saying things that may seem little like ‘It’s because she is a woman’ or tell a guy ‘Why are you acting like a woman?’
I think one subtle thing feminism has managed to do without even trying, is to teach us how to raise our sons, because maybe if we raised our sons right there might actually be no need for feminism. The same way there wouldn’t be an anti-racism campaign if there was no racism. Wouldn’t the world be a better place?
I don’t act like I speak for women, I can’t, I didn’t even really know about feminism till like 3 years ago, I don’t have a first-hand experience of what women face daily but I can talk about it, I can educate people on feminism, I can demand for a change in how women are treated starting from the people closest to me. I can and would help in any way I think I can.
So, when someone asks you what feminism has done for you,
you don’t have to reply them anyway tell them it hasn’t done something for you, tell them it’s doing a lot of things for you, and with a smile you can tell them it has taught you common sense, because
It is common sense that you cannot sum of the totality of someone’s life as a place in the kitchen
It is common sense that you cannot tell someone all they can aspire to be is married
It is common sense that you cannot expect praises for changing your child’s diaper
It is common sense that you cannot expect someone to always cook for you even days when she comes back from work knackered
It is common sense that people should be paid equally for skills acquired or services rendered regardless of their gender
It is common sense that people cannot be insulted and shamed just because they refused your advances
It is common sense to know that how a girl dresses or act is not an invitation to rape
It is common sense to know that a person can have an opinion on a topic regardless of their gender
Yeah, what feminism has really been doing all this while is to teach us common sense.
“Men ran the world, and look at the mess we have” – Isabele Allende